1fourfour

So it's been about thirty five hundred hours since my last post. I really considered not posting on this because I'm afraid that I am a totally different person than who I was 144 days ago. Now, some may be up for debate about whether this is a good change or bad - possibly, more likely than not, a bit of both.

Nonetheless, these changes have brought me to be the person that I am right now, the girl who is sitting in her bed, wide awake at 1:24 in the morning. These changes have been brought on by mistakes and growths. Yes, my blog is mostly about God and what he can do for you, but trust me, He's not the one making the mistakes here.

Truth is, God makes no mistakes. Deuteronomy 23:4 says, "The Rock! His work is perfect, For all His ways are just; A God of faithfulness and without injustice, Righteous and upright is He." He simply cannot, even though when we don't like something that has happened we'd love to think that it's just God's little "uh-oh" moment. Soooo, so far off. Actually it's the things like this that God uses to show us what we're doing wrong.. or what we're not noticing.... or maybe He even wants to see just how much faith we have in Him.

Ever heard of my friend Job? Yeah, I know, I never met him, so I can't reallllly be friends with him. If it counts for anything, I wish I could have. He was put in the WORST situations. These are way more intense than anything that we've thought it just one of God's mess ups. Instead, Job had almost everything taken away from him in the worst possible way. The crazy thing is Job never gave up on God. Job 5:8-11 says, "But if I were you, I would appeal to God; I would lay my cause before him. He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted. He provides rain for the earth; he sends water on the countryside. The lowly he sets on high, and those who mourn are lifted to safety." See, Job understood that he had a perfect creator who did everything for a reason and was always going to take care of him... he just needed to only rely on God and not care about anything else. I know that I couldn't have done what. I have a hard enough time dealing with what God gives me now like a small fight between friends or a bad grade. Even though we don't always know why God is doing something, we can know that He is doing it for a purpose that will only benefit us in the end.

Personally, it's something that you have to experience and realize. I'll be honest with you, my very few readers, college has challenged my faith a lot - and a lot of times I have messed up MAJORLY and sinned against the one person that will forever love me unconditionally. I've scorned Him because of the circumstanced I have faced and even threatened to completely walk away from Him. Looking back, though, I must admit, it has all brought me to this new level of love and understanding of my creator. I wish there was an easier way to get closer to God and to experience Him at an equally real level, but this is how God works. We'll never understand it, but, man, is He awesome.

new.

So this summer I haven't updated. I've been too busy living. I've experimented with different paths and chose the right one for me. I've walked through every open door until I found the one that led me home. I tore down every wall until I realized which ones I needed to keep up. I've meet everyones I came to see and let the others fade away. This summer, by far, was the best one yet. -DA

wrestling with a sinner's heart

What do you do when you don't know how to change? So, you've heard that God has this awesome plan, and you reallly, reaaaaaaaaally want to get in on it. You try and you try, but sometime's its really easy to lie about something. Or, you have a bad temper and you tend to wish bad things on people and slip with a swear word or two.. or more. Or, you're one of those. You want to believe, but you can't believe that someone as "loving and just" as God would put you through a situation like this. We've all been there. Maybe it's not the exact same situation, but every strong Christian can relate. These are times where once God pulls you though it, you're faith becomes so strong you feel like you can put God on your speed dial. First off, when you mess up, you should know that He has arms wide open and He's going to give us unconditional love. 1 John 3:1 says, "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him." So, since He loves us, He cares for us. He cares about us so much that He is going to use everything in your life to mold you into the person He wants you to be. I promise! Look! 1 Corinthians 10:13, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." It's going to be hard, and yeah, you're going to slip up. That's what forgiveness is all about! Actually, forgiveness is the hardest thing for me to put my head around. I don't know why He would do so much for the people that crucified His Son. I don't understand why He would want to have a personal relationship with someone that isn't worthy of His presence. But this I know for sure, God loves like no other.

Blessings

So I've been told by a few of my friends that I haven't been updating this enough. So, I'll updatye today. This one wont be deep and insightful as the others are; rather, this will be more like an update of my life. Right now, God's got me busy. I feel like I don't have very much time to do anything in recreation. I can't complain though, I kind of like being busy. It's better than being bored, right? Being busy keeps me out of trouble.

Devil's advocate

"Have you ever been shocked, by like electricity? Not static from walking on the carpet, but an actual current? Well when you first touch it and pull away it shocks you, but when you try again and let it flow through you, you get this tingley feeling all over. The first time we stopped, it was a shock. The new few times, more like that tingley feeling. I like that feeling." - Devil's advocate

One step at a time

enjoy people.

Time has always gotten me into trouble. Taking to much of it, losing track of it, it's just a hassle. I've been realizing that I don't exactly have much time here. Not that I'm dying or anything, but just until college. I'm trying to show the people that I care about more in this life just how much I love them. Now, this does not mean that I'm going to go through all of my friends and dedicate a post to them. Rather, this is for all of you. As well as every other part of me.

Last night, I was with one of my best friends. She made me do something that I had never done before. She made me paint! I'll try to post up a picture of what I did. Her painting was incredible. Who knew hat taking the time to just hang out with your best friend and paint could be so cool. I like just hanging out, taking time, and enjoying people. We didn't even realize that three hours had gone by. Crazy, right? She explained it to me. She said, "When you're painting you're using the right side of your brain. Time is on your left hemisphere." Nifty.

God's timeless right? Pssht, that guy's got it easy. ;)

remember (this ones kinda long)

I need to start updating this more. So, I've noticed that my head is almost always scattered brained.

From boys, yes I said it, to college, I've got a millllllion things on my mind. College really scares me. It's one of my insecurities. Yes, I do have those. Although, I've made a new discovery! I'm just simply worrying too much. Chances are, you are too! So stop it, okay? I know, now I'm sounding ridiculous. It's not that easy, right?

Let me guess, you don't think you have something that God can take care of. The Bible tells you to not worry, but God just doesn't understand. Sure, it's easy to cast something small on to Him, but what you're going through is legit! It's not some test that you've been worrying about, it's more like a dump truck full of stuff that's always on your mind.

Wellllllll, you're wrong!

Harsh, I know. Try casting your cares unto God and see what happens. It really did work for me. I promise I'm not trying to sell you something. It's more like me filling you in, letting you know what's going on. Try this whole "not worrying" thing with me. God's word backs it upp! So here's your guarantee:

1 Peter 5:6-7

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.

short

This one is going to be short, simple and to the point.

I like being confused. Actually, I love it.

Keep Breathing

Okay, so today was one of THOSE days. I'm usually not a cranky person, but today I was. I cannot believe how much of a brat I was. I'm sorry. I love to take my emotions out on other people. Sorry about that too. Anyways, this verse helped me. It reminded me to keep breathing. The world isn't ending just yet. Proverbs 16:32, " He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city."

slow down

This year is going by like crazy. I cannot believe that I graduate in three months. My world is absolutely spinning, but I kind of like it. I do need to slow down. I need to breathe in and breathe out. I lose time by wasting it. It's time to slow down a bit. Relax. Let's see where else God can take me in my little time left in the Poconos.

squint and pray

So thus far nothing has been so incredible that I've needed to blog about except for what I've recently discovered. My life is absolutely insane right now. I have a million things going on from boyfriends, college, keeping up with my work - it's ridiculous. All of this combined with the stress of being a teenager makes everything seem so blurry. It's hard to see. Honestly, sometimes I forget to bow down before my Heavenly Father and ask Him what He wants. I forget that His will is the "big picture." All I can say is, when everything is blurry, don't forget to squint. Then you'll see the bigger picture.